Congratulations - your partner is pregnant and soon your family will grow!

You are probably feeling pretty excited for what is to come - who could blame you! It is a pretty cool thing happening. But you may also be feeling pretty nervous - especially when it comes to the giving birth part.

You most likely have never seen anyone give birth before but you want to be the perfect partner for your loved one. But how when you have no experience? There is only so much a book can teach you - if you even remember it when the time comes.

Then they mention a doula. A DO-WHAT? A doula - that is me! I am there to not only help your partner, but to help you too!

Your reaction to this may be one of two (which we have seen be the most common reactions):
1. HELLS YA! Let's hire someone to help me help you!
2. What do we need a doula for? I can figure this thing out. Do you think I won't be a good enough birth partner?

Hopefully, by the end of reading this - if you reaction was number 2 - it will change to number 1. And if your reaction is number 1 - then you will be even more excited to have me join you at your birth!

The most important thing to know about me is - I AM NOT THERE TO REPLACE YOU. I am there to make you look like the most bad-ass superstar supportive birth partner who knows exactly what to do when so your partner feels good while they are busy birthing!

"My husband felt such a sense of  relief and was able to focus  and enjoy every moment that was ahead of us"
-S.D.

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The thing is, I feel for partners. A LOT is expected from you which is really pretty crazy, especially if this is your first (or even if you have been here before).

Here are some things I can help you with:
  1.  Inform you of hospital protocols and routine procedures
  2. Explain the many options available for birth so you and your partner can figure out what is important for your family
  3. Share with you ways that you can help your partner manage their birth sensations
  4. Provide you both with the emotional support that is so needed during such an emotional time
  5. Help you understand the emotional and physical labour signs 
  6. No idea when to actually call the midwife? I can help with that too!
  7. In the case of longer labours, being up for hours on end is really hard. We can work as a perfect tag team so you can sleep when you need to and your partner will never be alone.
  8. Help you feel confident in advocating for what your partner wants in their birth
  9. Infant Feeding Information and Support
  10. Postpartum help - I can show you ways to soothe baby, how to change a diaper, how to swaddle your baby like the perfect burrito - just to name a few.

Can you imagine doing all that with no help?  That is quite a bit to expect from someone who has never done this before... and that is where I come in!

Doulas and partners make the perfect team. No one knows the birther better, or loves them and baby more then you -and that is exactly the most important thing you bring to the birth - LOVE.

Oxytocin, also known as the Love Hormone, is what made the baby and it is what makes baby be born too! And while your partner will naturally produce that oxytocin by themselves, having you there to help and to love them will make that oxytocin stronger and better.
Plus, you will be making your partner feel pretty special. 

 It is very difficult to see the person that you love to experience discomfort and  unless you have been to tons of births and are super informed, it is hard to know what "normal" is and totally understandable that you may get worried, and that can affect the birth experience. From me, your partner will receive encouragement and feel safe in knowing that what is happening is normal. If they can feel the fear from you, they may get worried as well and ditch what they want most just to make everyone else calm down.

But remember, I am not just there for the birther. I am there for you too! Depending on how actively involved in the birth you want to be, I can share my extensive knowledge with you and give you ideas on the best ways to support them - then I am there to fill in the gaps. You only have two hands and if those hands are busy giving your partner a massage, you will need our hands to grab them a drink, to apply a cool cloth on a very overheated body, or even to run out and grab you a coffee!

 And if you are not comfortable with being super hands on, well then you can buy the coffee and I will be there to massage your partner. 

It is also important to remember that birth can be unpredictable. If things veers off plan and decisions need to be made, I am there to help you get to an informed decision by asking the right questions.

Supporting a birthing person is a big deal and it is pretty unfair to expect you to take on all the different roles that are essential to having a positive birth experience. Together, all of us can be there to assist your partner in different ways, and with the teamwork with your medical care provider, a positive birth can be achieved.


The Maya's Nest Doulas and Birth Photographers provide information, support and nurturing while capturing life's most precious moments to families in Coquitlam, Port Coquitlam, Port Moody, Pitt Meadows, Maple Ridge, New Westminster, Burnaby, Vancouver, Langley and Surrey.